Today someone reached out for coaching. She was having a breakdown, HELP!!
She shared with me that she spoke up to a friend about concerns she had in their relationship. She chose to “go there” with her friend when she could’ve stayed quiet. She was honest and did what she thought was the right thing to do to be and have a better friend, and it wasn’t received well. The friend got mad, started slinging mud and she realizes now she and that friend currently do not have the relationship she had hoped for. The friend even went public on Facebook with her rant!
OUCH. Sad face. Relationships can be tricky!
Can you relate? Do you ever feel misunderstood? Does a conversation sometimes go sideways when you have the best intentions?
Here was my coaching:
- You are authentic. You did the best you could. And you are courageous! Real leaders of their life, don’t play small. They take risks, they go deep, they say things even when it’s hard.
- We get to have Level 10 friendships! Most people settle for relationships that aren’t meaningful or real, they live with a ton of BS in their relationships, sometimes even with their partner or own kids.
- You are not responsible for other people’s feelings. Your friend gets to feel her feelings.
- Other people’s opinion of you is none of your business.
- Lastly, are you ready for this? Your words not landing with your friend is feedback about how you said it. How could you have changed your delivery so that your message was received as intended?! AND, re-read #3.
- Be loving to yourself. Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t question if you should or shouldn’t have spoken up. Your intention was connection and love. Send your friend some love strings right now!
Life is so life-y, is a quote I heard from another trainer. And I couldn’t agree more. We get to be committed to being clear, loving and present in our relationships.
I declare that I want every relationship in my life to be a 10. And I’m committed to working towards my 10’s.
Are you? How would you rate the relationships in your life? I’d love to hear. It’s okay to be honest with yourself. It’s how we grow.
P.S. If it would serve you to get REAL with your relationships, join me at one of my Ignite Your Life RETREATS this spring, summer or fall where I lead conversations on getting REAL and RECOMMIT to being courageous and authentic with yourself AND your relationships. Check out the upcoming dates here.
Are you ready DESIGN YOUR BEST LIFE! I know you want to do something great with your life. I know you want to BE more!
Click here to get started on your BEST LIFE TODAY!!